Dear Chronic Stress

Oh, chronic stress, how we love to talk about you, but then not really do anything about you!

It’s true though, right?! We talk about how stressed we are or how something is stressful, but do we take the opportunity to assess that stress and determine what, if anything, we can do to mitigate it? Or do we go along with it, resigning ourselves to just deal? I suppose I can only speak for myself and my clients, but what I find is that we tend to fall into that second category. We’re good at identifying the stress but not necessarily at changing things up to prevent it from recurring.

I know, I know, it’s not always that simple. There are absolutely some things that are outside our control, but many common stressors are well within it – at least to a degree. And for those that aren’t, that’s why we build in stress resiliency techniques – meditation, breath work, community/connection, movement, nature, sleep, healthy eating, etc. – so that when faced with something we cannot change or affect, we have the tools to process it in a healthier way and choose a response that leads to growth. 

I talk a lot about stress, its effects, ways to mitigate it, and hidden sources. But what I haven’t talked much about is this concept of a stress audit. It’s not a well-known concept – because I made it up, lol – but I think it’s a useful tool to figure out where you need to dig in and assess, especially when you feel overwhelmed by a lot of stressful things at once. Doing an organized audit like this allows you to put some structure around your stress and take a step back.

So, it goes like this… Make a list of categories. This will likely look similar for us all, but there could be some categories unique to you. These could be things like home, work, health, finance, etc. Then for each category, make a list of pain points. Pain points don’t have to be only big stressors; they can also be the tiny daily annoyances. Think drops into the stress beaker. 

At this point, you’re probably thinking this sounds like the opposite of a gratitude exercise – “I’m supposed to focus on the good things, Sara, not focus on the bad! This is terrible advice!” Just bear with me.

Beside each pain point, you will write a strategy for reducing or removing that stress. The goal here is not to focus on all the crappy things you’ve identified, but rather on the opportunities you have to improve your quality of life. From here, prioritize a pain point or two, and focus! The saying goes that what you focus on gets done, and it’s true. Don’t focus on them all at once because then it’s just overwhelming and you won’t do anything! Start with a couple, and slowly but surely you will start making incremental but sustainable changes in your stress load.

Now we can’t stop there. While we’re implementing one or two key improvement plans, we also need to actively engage in those stress resiliency-building tools. Remember, it’s about removing/reducing stressors + building your stress tolerance. 

Hopefully creating your stress audit will allow you to feel more empowered and clearer on your plan to get closer to the healthy, intentional life you want. After all, we are the architects of our own lives!